What Would You Trade for a Dream?

Several years ago, a television interviewer asked Sophia Loren the secret of her success. The actress didn’t hesitate for a moment. “I am successful,” she replied, “because I was willing to give up being anonymous.”

It appears that anyone who ultimately achieves their dreams has a clear idea what the trade-off was that was needed to accomplish it. It’s a characteristic often lacking in those who attribute their lack of success to bad breaks, circumstances over which they had no control or lack of money.

Money, in fact, becomes a popular scapegoat in stories about failure.

Most often, however, our dreams are created out of time, not money. In Jean-Louis Servan-Schrieber’s The Art of Time, he makes this startling observation: “We think much more about the use of money, which is renewable, than we do about time which is irreplaceable.”

Here’s the fascinating—thought often overlooked—truth about what we get in life: everything we have, whether we are living our dreams or not, is acquired by making a trade.

We trade our time, our talent, our experience, our attitudes for the lifestyle we create. Sadly, many people also trade in their dreams, settling instead for a less than satisfying life because it may seem easier or quicker to achieve the ordinary.

Nowhere is this more poetically illustrated than in Paulo Coelho’s little gem The Alchemist. The hero of this tale is Santiago, a young Spanish shepherd, who has already traded in his parent’s dream for him of becoming a priest for his own dream of traveling.

Along the way, he encounters a wise man who prods him to achieve his personal destiny. To add motivation, the wise man points out a number of people who traded in their dreams for a seemingly secure life.

One of them is a shopkeeper who resists his lifelong dream of a trip to Mecca. At one point he says to Santiago, “Today, I understand something I didn’t see before: every blessing ignored become a curse. “

What the shopkeeper demonstrates so poignantly is a universal truth. When we trade off our dreams for a lesser life, we are doomed to unhappiness.

On the other hand, if we trade off our fears and doubts for our own dream quest, satisfaction and joy that we have never known before are inevitable.

So is there anything you still need to trade in order to be living your dreams? Since all life is a trade anyway, why avoid what you really want? You’re already spending your time and energy doing something. Make it count.

Don’t you think dreams are a better investment than drudgery?

A Cure for the Can’ts

Last week my 8-year-old granddaughter Zoe dropped something off at my place. As she was heading back down the stairs, she said, “I’m so excited. I’ve got a surprise to tell you about. Here’s a clue: ny.”

NY? Not yet? I was not solving the mystery.

A couple of hours later, I was at Zoe’s house and she couldn’t wait to tell me the news. Her family had decided to visit New York in October. This is their most ambitious vacation so far and Zoe was already bursting with excitement.

“There are museums and parks and I get to see The Lion King,” she exclaimed.

“I need to earn money,” she said—and she was wasting no time. “Do you have any paying chores for me?”

I expect  I’ll be hearing that question frequently in the next several months. When she came for a visit on Saturday, The Trip was on her mind. She had calculated that she wanted to raise $180. She and her father had figured out that her monthly goal for fund-raising was $20.

We brainstormed some options and I volunteered a small amount as seed money. She was off and running.

When Zoe was working her way through the Harry Potter series, every encounter with her began with an announcement of the page number she had reached. I suspect that I’ll be having regular updates on her money-raising project in the months to come.

More importantly, I’m happy that Zoe has become a practicing goalsetter at such an early age. It’s a tool that far too many adults don’t possess.

How many lovely goals and plans are abandoned because of the all-too-common approach used by the frustrated? It goes something like this: inspiration strikes, a  wonderful idea appears, then resistance kicks in with the dreambashing thought, “I don’t have the money for that,” and the idea is dead.

Do that often enough and inspiration goes elsewhere.

On the other hand, those who live with a steady stream of exciting ideas they’re bringing to life go about it in a very different way.

First, they decide what they want to do. Then, they figure out how to finance it. Perhaps it involves creating a new project to generate cash flow to fund the dream. It nearly always turns on creative thinking and uncovering hidden options.

It probably calls for some sort of tradeoff. In Zoe’s case, she may have fewer play dates with her friends while she’s helping her grandmother out. She’ll also resist the temptations of Toys R Us and use the library more and the bookstore less.

Of course, this won’t feel like deprivation to Zoe. She’s serving her apprenticeship in the fine art of building a dream.

“The mightiest works have been accomplished,” said Walter Bowie, “by those who have kept their ability to dream great dreams.” I’m going to do my part to make sure that Zoe stays in that group.

Best of all, there’s plenty of room for all of us if we are bold enough to ignore the can’ts and hows.

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Want to spread some entrepreneurial spirit and acquire more dreambuilding tools? Then join me for my upcoming Joyfully Jobless Weekends. I’ll be in Houston on February 15 & 16 and Phoenix on February 22 &23. Y’all come.

 

Building a Hothouse for Your Dreams

Dreams are extremely fragile—especially in their early days. They need to be nurtured and surrounded by support. Here are a handful of easy ways to get your dreams off to a great start.

° Passion must be present. While a dream may be born in passion, it’s up to you to keep it alive. If you’re halfhearted and lukewarm about them, your dreams will never come true.

One way to keep passion high is to spend a few minutes every day visualizing the successful completion of your dream. How does it look, smell, taste, sound, feel? Allow your vision to keep pulling you forward.

° Take good care of the boss. It doesn’t matter how great a dream is if the dreamkeeper is too tired or uninspired to bring it to life.

Sometimes the easiest things to do are also the easiest to overlook—like drinking plenty of water and avoiding toxic people. Dreamkeepers have an obligation to create the healthiest and most balanced life possible.

° Make your workspace a place that inspires you. Whether you work on a beach with your laptop or in an extra bedroom in your home, make it inspiring as well as efficient.

Burn incense, play classical music, have a tabletop fountain, and/or cover your walls with art or an inspiration board that pictures your dreams. And if you’re sitting on a beach, pick one with a great view.

° Take responsibility for staying inspired. There are three ways to run a business: Inspired, Uninspired or With Occasional Flashes of Inspiration.

You can identify those things that inspire you and expose yourself to them frequently. Whether it’s music or the words of a particular author or the company of another entrepreneur, know where your Inspiration Well is and go to the Well often.

° Create your own Hall of Fame. Ask a successful actor or musician who inspired them and they’ll probably answer quickly. Ask a would-be entrepreneur the same question and you’re apt to be greeted by a shrug of  the shoulders.

If you’re going to succeed, you need to be inspired by real people. Read biographies or interviews of successful people and pay attention to the philosophies they share.

° Be open to being inspired at all times. You never know where a great idea or solution to a problem will come from. Carry a notebook with you at all times so you can jot down ideas as they occur.

If you spend a lot of time driving, you may want to carry a voice-activated recorder to capture your thoughts.

° Notice what catches your attention, what makes you happy, what causes an emotional response. These are all clues. Don’t miss them.

° Collect entrepreneurial friends. There’s almost nothing more rewarding than spending time in the presence of kindred spirits who can add their own creative ideas and encouragement to what you’re doing. Cultivating such friendships will be one of the best investments you can make.

° Change the scenery. There’s nothing that dulls the creative spirit more quickly than daily routine. You can counteract the dulling effect of that by taking a field trip or creative excursion at least once a week.

Take your laptop to a coffee shop, visit a museum or walk in a Japanese garden. Challenge yourself to come up with new backdrops that feed your soul.

Fuel Your Impossible Dreams with Intention and Chutzpah

Guest post by Cynthia Morris

In 2000, I stood in the Père Lachasie cemetery in Paris, marveling. I marveled at the beauty around me. I marveled at death brought so intimately to life in this city of graves.

I marveled that I could speak French. After ten years away from my francophilia, I had found my way back to France and the pleasures of speaking French. Playing with the language felt like coming back to an old friend that I wanted to know better.

There, full of the marvelous on a gray day in Paris, I vowed to return every year. And I have, every year except 2002 and 2003.

What made this possible? When I made the vow, I had no idea how I would fund transatlantic trips to one of the most expensive cities on the planet.

Oddly enough, a long-deceased bookseller made coming back easier. Sylvia Beach, the original owner of Shakespeare and Company bookstore, was a compelling figure and the bigger story of her life inspired me to write a novel based on her.

On my annual trips to Paris, I delved into Sylvia’s world. I relentlessly explored the streets and alleys of Paris, sniffing for clues to what this place was like in 1937. I rummaged in dusty bookshops, spoke to booksellers and befriended random passersby, as one does in Paris.

I became more familiar with this city of marvels. These trips helped me feel that I was building on my French degree. These adventures gave me the feeling that I was living my passion, one stroll at a time.

How did a single woman building her business afford trips to one of the most expensive places on the planet? I wasn’t funded and I’m not rich.

Commitment drives chutzpah

My intention to travel and my dedication to this project, along with some creative fundraising, allowed me to travel without going into debt. But I had to gather up my chutzpah – get gutsy – to make it work.

In 2003, drawn to Paris by the Shakespeare and Company literary festival, I conceived of a plan to raise funds from making art. I approached friends and family, promising a hand-painted postcard to anyone who gave me money.

I drew and painted and sent seventeen cards. The money from that wasn’t a ton, but it fueled at least one day in Paris.

Then, in 2005, I began leading workshops in Paris and other parts of France. Combining my coaching, my teaching, and my love for beauty and art, I created a unique experience for others. Profits from these workshops began funding my trips to France.

Clueless but willing to try

When I was a fresh graduate with a French degree and no clue what the future held, I desperately wanted to live in France. After that ten-year hiatus from my francophilia, I made the commitment to keep my passion for it alive.

My historical novel, with its demands for more and more research, helped me live my dream and honor my commitment. Now, I’m content to live in the US and visit Europe often.

Your focus and commitment will look totally different than mine. Not everyone wants to annually visit Paris or wherever.

But imagine the difference it would make if you took your wish and turned it into a commitment. Even if you don’t know how it will pan out, dare to commit.

Too often we squelch our dreams because we don’t immediately know how they will be realized. But with the power of intention and the focus of a project you want to bring to life, answers and solutions appear along the way.

What’s your Paris? What commitment can you make to that passion and what project will help focus it?

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Cynthia Morris loves putting her French degree to good use in Paris. When she’s not in France, she coaches writers and entrepreneurs from Denver, Colorado. Cynthia’s novel, Chasing Sylvia Beach, launched online on June 22nd, 2012. Find out more here: http://www.ChasingSylviaBeach.com