We humans are born question askers. Listen to any toddler and you’ll hear a stream of questions about any subject that catches their attention. “Why?” is the most frequently used word in their vocabularies.

During the days when I taught high school English, I used to say that my idea of hell was being in a roomful of teenagers all screaming, “Do we have to?” It was a question that often erupted after I gave a challenging assignment.

Questions are such a common part of everyday communication that most people don’t give much thought to them.  I’d like to suggest that you to pay more attention.

I started to do so when I noticed that a popular television talk show host seemed to turn the most fascinating guests into complete bores. As I watched more closely, I discovered that his questions often led to dead ends, giving his guests no place to go or no story to tell.

People who have charisma, who draw others to themselves, usually have a reputation for being good listeners. Part of their secret, it seems to me, is that they ask great questions to begin with and then give their full attention to the answer, prodding and encouraging when necessary.

They make people feel valued because they listen to the answers.

Asking good questions isn’t just a way to win friends and influence people, however. It’s an overlooked key to success.

Not all questions are illuminating. Many, in fact, stop us dead in our tracks. “How are you going to do that?” or “Why haven’t I gotten farther?” are the kinds of questions that lead us down the path of doubt, not dreams.

Learning to ask better questions of ourselves can get us headed in the right direction and keep us moving forward.

Mark Victor Hansen and Robert Allen, the authors of The One Minute Millionaire, point out that when we ask the wrong questions we condemn ourselves to living below our potential. They write, “If you ask yourself, ‘How do I earn or create a million dollars?’ your mind goes to work to discover the answer. Your mind is compelled to work ceaselessly until a satisfactory answer is found.

“Note that most individuals ask themselves questions like these: ‘How do I get a job, salary or work?’ or ‘Can I earn $50,000 doing this?’ The wrong question will generate the wrong result or a less than outstanding outcome.

“Questions predetermine the answer. The size of your question determines the size of your answer. Few people ever ask million-dollar earning, inventing, innovating, generating and creating questions.”

If you keep a journal or idea notebook, start making a list of provocative questions you’d like answered in your own life. Ask them in the most compelling way you can think of.

For example, “How can I deliver the most fabulous service possible?” is a lot more intriguing than, “How can I give better service?”

Consider questions about spirituality, relationships, personal growth and improving the overall quality of life, as well as questions about creating the most brilliant business possible.

Keep adding to the list and leave room after each question for the answers to come. Be willing, also,  to be patient in receiving your answers.

As writer Zora Neale Hurston reminds us, “There are years that ask questions and years that answer.” The important thing is to ask the best questions to begin with—the ones that are worthy of your dreams.

There seems to be a trend going on in my e-mail these days. I keep getting messages from folks saying they know they want to be self-employed but are totally stumped about what to do.

I understand the frustration. There was a big gap between the moment I realized I wanted to be self-employed and the time I actually knew what I wanted to start.

It wouldn’t have taken me so long to figure things out if I had realized that getting good ideas is nothing more than an exercise in creativity.

One of the best starting points is to ask this simple question: Who has a problem I know how to solve?

You might come up with an initial answer such as, “Lots of people don’t have enough time to do everything they want or need to do.”

Start a list of possible solutions based on what you can offer. It might go something like this:

° I love to run errands and know my way around the city.

° I know how to download music on an iPod.

° I know how to save money on car repairs and groceries.

° I can organize a messy office in no time flat.

° I love putting together itineraries for special interest trips.

° I love helping seniors who aren’t able to do things for themselves.

Once you’ve got a list started, decide which idea sounds like the most fun for you. (Yes, fun comes first.)  Then start thinking about the potential clients for such a service.

Let’s say you choose downloading iPods.

Who could use such a service?  (The answer is “lots of people”!)

The next questions are:

° How can I connect with the folks who need this service?

° How do I price my service?

° Could I get some free publicity for this?

° Would it hold my interest long enough to make it a viable profit center?

° Would it be fun to do even as a short term profit center?

Asking and answering better questions is the way to develop tiny seeds of an idea. Alas, many people handle ideas with excuses and dead end statements such as, “If that was really such a good idea I’m sure someone else would have thought of it.”

Greet your ideas with enthusiastic questions and you’ll find yourself with a promising enterprise waiting to be born. As Hope Wallis pointed out, “Opportunities are like pole beans. You have to keep picking them so more can grow.”

 

 

    What do we live for, if not to make life 

        less difficult for each other?

George Eliot

From the moment I met Ruth, she told me that she hated her career as an operating room nurse. Despite the fact that she possessed an adventurous and creative spirit, she never quite managed to leave medicine.

One day she called to tell me she had injured her back while lifting a patient. Then she enumerated all the other injuries—physical and mental—that had occurred on the job. 

At the end of her litany, she said she thought the solution to her frustration was to move to a different department in the hospital. I was not convinced that this would solve her problem so I challenged her by asking, “If that’s the cause, how can it be the cure?”

That question had far greater impact than if I’d made a statement about what I thought she should do.

Asking good questions doesn’t just help illuminate difficult situations: asking is also a way to solicit support for our dreams. While some people resist asking for help or information thinking it will make them appear needy, there’s a healthy way to go about this questioning business.

In her delightful book Educating Alice, author Alice Steinbach writes that as a child her family remembers her pestering them with questions. She explains it this way: 

“Given my insatiable curiosity and intense admiration for Nancy Drew, my future plans hinged on entering the detective profession. I saw myself as Nancy Drew aging into Miss Marple. It was the perfect life for me, I thought then, one that would require me to constantly ask questions, find out the answers, and along the way learn a lot of new things.”

Steinbach didn’t become a detective, but she did have a successful career as a journalist where her question-asking skills got a regular workout.

Soliciting information isn’t the only reason to ask questions. Here are some others that are particularly useful to the entrepreneur.

* Clarifying questions. Good communicators use this technique all the time to make sure that they understand what was said. “Did I understand you correctly when you said you wanted to give me a free massage?” is just such a question.

* Getting ideas. Asking questions of yourself can bring answers from your subconscious mind. 

I frequently ask myself, “How can I make things better?” Sometimes the answer is mundane (dust  the bookshelves), but often it serves as an invitation for some grander project.

* Seeking advice. These are the kinds of questions I get asked the most. “How do I market my services on a shoestring? What do you think of this idea? Do you know anyone who can help me break into the specialty food marketing business?” 

Entrepreneurs must be willing to ask for advice from informed sources. They must also be willing to listen and not argue with the advice they’re given. 

* Helping customers make a decision. Successful sales people are skillful at asking questions that bring prospects to a commitment. 

“So would you like a six-month or twelve-month supply?” is a decision-making query.

The esteemed business guru Peter Drucker said, “My greatest strength as a consultant is to be ignorant and ask a few questions.”  

So where are you needing support? Who can you ask? What can you ask of yourself? Sometimes we fail to receive support because nobody knows we need it. 

Think of the world as a big, rich resource center that has everything you need to make your dreams come true. Tapping into it may be as easy as asking the right questions. 

 

Years ago, I read a wonderful book by Alan Lakein called How to Get Control of Your Time and Your Life. One of the things that stayed with me from this nifty little manual was the question, “What’s the best use of my time right now?” It’s a question that helped me regain my focus when I felt scattered, reminded me about priorities and, most importantly, pointed out that I was in charge of how I was spending my time.

Anyone who spends time with a toddler knows that their exploration of the world is filled with a steady stream of questions. Annoying as that can be to an adult, it’s also an essential learning tool for the child. 

As common as the humble question is, I don’t think we’ve given enough attention to the importance of asking good ones. I certainly hadn’t thought much about it, although I was acutely aware of the all too familiar dream killing question, “How are you going to do that?” which greets millions of new ideas. 

Several years ago I read The One Minute Millionaire by Mark Victor Hansen and Robert G. Allen which gave me a new perspective. In their chapter The Size of the Questions Determines the Size of the Result, they write, “The wrong question will generate the wrong result or a less than outstanding outcome. Questions predetermine the answer. The size of your question determines the size of your answer. Few people ever ask million-dollar earning, inventing, generating and creating questions. They are yours to ask.”

How can you learn to ask better questions? For starters, notice the ones that stop you dead in your tracks. Notice, too, any thoughts you may have that asking questions is a sign of weakness. (Fanatics don’t ask questions. They make pronouncements.) Listen, too, to good questions and see how they open up creative thinking.

Last year, I decided to try a little experiment. Actually, it wasn’t so little. I adopted a question that I asked myself over and over all day, every day. It sounds ridiculously simple, but it produced an endless stream of joyous results. That little question is, “How can I make it better?” “It” usually meant whatever was in front of me. Sometimes the answer was rather ordinary…along the lines of, “Make order on the top of your desk.” Almost always, the answer directed me to taking small actions, things I could accomplish immediately that led me closer to bigger achievements. 

I urge you to adopt this question for yourself and see where it leads you. As Hansen and Allen point out, “As you ask yourself and others better questions, your results will vastly improve, the world will be better off, your quantity and quality of service will expand, the difference you make will experience quantum change, and you will leave a profound legacy in the footprints of time.”

°°°°°°°°°°

If you’ve been wondering how your can make your business better, join Alice Barry and me at our upcoming Follow Through Camp, September 11 & 12, and leave with answers that you can turn into action immediately.

In her delightful book Educating Alice, author Alice Steinbach writes that as a child her family remembers her pestering them with questions. She explains it this way: “Given my insatiable curiosity and intense admiration for Nancy Drew, my future plans hinged on entering the detective profession. I saw myself as Nancy Drew aging into Miss Marple. It was the perfect life for me, I thought then, one that would require me to constantly ask questions, find out the answers, and along the way learn a lot of new things.” Steinbach didn’t become a detective, but she did have a successful career as a journalist where her question-asking skills got a regular workout.

Soliciting information isn’t the only reason to ask questions. Asking is also a way to solicit support for our dreams. While some people resist asking for help or information thinking it will make them appear needy, there’s a healthy way to go about this questioning business. Here are some others that are particularly useful to the entrepreneur.

* Clarifying questions. Good communicators use this technique all the time to make sure that they understand what was said. “Did I understand you correctly when you said you wanted to give me a free massage?” is just such a question.

* Getting ideas. Asking questions of yourself can bring answers from your subconscious mind. When I begin a new project, I keep asking myself,  “How can this be easy?” That question is also a reminder not to make things more complicated than necessary.

* Seeking advice. These are the kinds of questions I get asked the most. “How do I market my services on a shoestring? What do you think of this idea? Do you know anyone who can help me break into the specialty food marketing business?” Entrepreneurs must be willing to ask for advice from informed sources. They must also be willing to listen and not argue with the advice they’re given. 

* Helping customers make a decision. Successful sales people are skillful at asking questions that bring prospects to a commitment. “So would you like a six-month or twelve-month supply?” is a decision-making query.

The esteemed business guru Peter Drucker said, “My greatest strength as a consultant is to be ignorant and ask a few questions.”  So where are you needing support? Who can you ask? What can you ask of yourself? Sometimes we fail to receive support because nobody knows we need it. 

Think of the world as a big, rich resource center that has everything you need to make your dreams come true. Tapping into it may be as easy as asking the right questions. 

What do we live for, if not to make life  less difficult for each other?~ George Eliot

Yesterday I mentioned that “How you gonna do that?” is a question that stops the idea flow. I’ve always been annoyed by cynical queries, but  it wasn’t until I read The One Minute Millionaire by Mark Victor Hansen and Robert G. Allen that I really began to understand why questions matter so much. They write, “The size of your question determines the size of your answer. Few people ever ask  earning, inventing, innovating, generating and creating questions.” 

Whether you’re asking a question of yourself or helping someone else find a creative solution, what kind of question can help you find better answers? You can start with something as simple as, “What’s the best use of my time right now?” that helps you focus on a positive outcome. 

There’s another question starter that seems to be the companion of the creative thinker. Two little words can open up the imagination: What If? What if people could carry their favorite music around in a tiny device? What if we build a Website where friends could connect? What if we put solar panels on the roof of a car?

Or try asking yourself, “What can I do to…”

grow myself?

create abundance?

serve others?

find kindred spirits?

build my dreams?

have more adventure?

Don’t dismiss too quickly questions that challenge you and don’t stop asking because you don’t get an answer a minute after the question crosses your mind.

If I’m stuck or bored, there’s one question that I’ve found guarantees I’ll swing into action. That question, which seems ridiculously simple, is “How can I make things better right now?” As soon as I ask it, I start looking right in front of me for the answer. Sometimes the answer is a bit mundane (i.e. fold the laundry or stop being so grumpy), but move often it leads to an awareness of larger improvement that can be started immediately. 

Most certainly, notice whether you’re asking yourself questions that welcome or discourage creative thoughts. Once you become aware of the power of questions, you’ll start asking for the answers that you truly want.

$100 Hour: Trendspotter Faith Popcorn suggested that time is the hot commodity and great opportunity lies in creating a business designed to save people time. Personal concierge services have become increasingly popular, as have more specialized things. One of my favorites is a service that downloads music on busy folks’ iPods.

Explore More: Several years ago, I met  Maureen Thomson when she showed up in Making a Living Without a Job in Denver. Since then, she’s come to seminars in Boston and Las Vegas.  I’ve had the fun of watching her take a little idea of being a wedding officiant and build it into an enchanting business called Memorable Ceremonies. Maureen also writes a column for theNorth Denver News and her recent piece called Simple Pleasures brought more mail than anything she’d written. Take a look and I think you’ll see why. It’s a terrific piece about her own joyfully jobless journey and how she’s moved ahead. 

Outlandish ideas move the world ahead far more powerfully than logical steps. An outrageous imagination is ultimately the most practical contribution. ~ Alan Cohen