On Conduct Unbecoming

A few weeks before Christmas, a friend was recounting her frustrating experience at the post office. “Not only were the clerks cranky,” she said. “The line was full of people who obviously don’t come to the post office very often.  It was like trying to get through an airport full of infrequent flyers.”

I knew just what she meant.  When people are unaccustomed to doing something, such as traveling, they’re unaware of customs and procedures which are second nature to those who are experienced.  Even the casual observer would notice that amateurs behave differently.

It’s not surprising, then, to see new business owners behave in ways that are inappropriate, but that doesn’t excuse such conduct. Behaving badly will not move you toward success and will not make your journey a pleasant one.

If you’re taking on the role of entrepreneur, here are some pitfalls to avoid no matter what stage of development your business is in.

° Never complain. And especially do not complain to your customers. A friend was checking in for a flight and was told that it had been canceled. “Could you put him on a different carrier?” I asked.

The gate agent snarled at me and said that was impossible, then added, “We’ve been working without a contract for two years.”

Not only was that none of my business, it had nothing to do with the situation.

If  business is slow or you have unsolved problems, chose carefully with whom you discuss these circumstances.

° Never do your accounting in public. Sarah decided to organize a monthly dinner for women in business. She found a location, got a good price on the dinner and began advertising.  She intended to cover her costs and make a small profit for her efforts.

After a couple of women challenged the cost, Sarah became defensive and at the third meeting addressed this by defensively telling the group (most of whom were delighted by the opportunity to meet) where every penny went.

Some people were shocked by this public disclosure, but it had an even more damaging effect on Sarah, who cancelled the project thinking she was the target of criticism.

While people who are not doing well financially seem the most eager to talk about it, your finances should never be the subject of  discussion with anyone other than your accountant, business partners or spouse.

° Tell the truth. In fact, take a cue from Nordstrom’s and make it your policy to under promise and over deliver. Being ruthlessly honest is not only good manners, it will keep your relationships running smoothly with your customers and build your reputation as a trustworthy person—one worth doing business with.

And if you’re just getting started in business, don’t exaggerate your experience, but don’t be embarrassed by your lack of it, either. Emphasize what you have to offer (such as devotion to your clients) and focus on your assets.

° Apologize only when it’s appropriate. There’s a hilarious scene in Wayne’s World when Garth and Wayne meet Alice Cooper and prostrate themselves chanting, “We are not worthy.”

That may be funny in the movies, but it’s pathetic to see adults with a misplaced sense of people pleasing grovel in front of their customers, apologizing for things that they aren’t responsible for—such as the weather.

If you make a mistake, by all means apologize, but don’t apologize for the fact that you are selling something—or you’re taking up space on Earth.

° Remember that half-hearted attempts create half-hearted results. If you are tentative about your business, if you never quite complete things, if you are waiting around for goodness to happen, you’re not fully engaged.

The world is littered with abandoned projects that could have succeeded with a full out attack.

Giving up on your dreams (and blaming it on circumstances or other people) is the most unbecoming conduct of all.